Clean Your House by Shoving Everything in One Closet
Out of sight, out of mind, into the void
Deep cleaning is for people with time. The rest of us have discovered the magic closet—that one space where everything goes to disappear from view and memory.
*Studies referenced may not exist. Statistics are entirely fabricated.
📝Step-by-Step Instructions
Designate the Chaos Closet
Choose one closet to sacrifice. This closet will absorb all sins. It is the closet of holding.
Gather All Clutter
When guests are coming, sweep through the house like a tornado. Everything goes in the closet. Everything.
Apply Pressure If Needed
The closet will resist. Use your body weight to close the door. Ignore any crashing sounds from within.
Never Open It Again
That closet is now sealed forever. Buy new items rather than retrieving old ones.
⚠️Warnings & Disclaimers
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