The Art of Ghosting Your Therapist
A comprehensive guide to avoiding mental health progress
Why face your problems when you can simply disappear? This guide teaches you the time-honored tradition of abandoning professional help exactly when you need it most.
*Studies referenced may not exist. Statistics are entirely fabricated.
📝Step-by-Step Instructions
Schedule Appointments You Won't Attend
Book sessions during times you know you'll be 'busy.' Golf, napping, and staring at walls all count as scheduling conflicts.
Develop Elaborate Avoidance Excuses
Create a rotating list of excuses: car trouble, work meetings, surprise family visits, alien abduction. Keep them guessing.
Stop Replying Entirely
Eventually, stop responding to all communication. Change your number if necessary. Consider moving to a new city.
Convince Yourself You're Cured
After three weeks of avoidance, declare yourself mentally healthy. You've clearly worked through everything on your own.
⚠️Warnings & Disclaimers
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📝Victim Testimonials
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